So I want to really learn my camera and get better at taking pictures and to an extent manipulating my pictures with software..... I know other people who have done this and it sounds like a fun idea so I'm post a pic a day on Flickr. I may not post every picture on the blog but perhaps some of the more interesting ones will make it here.
In the last couple of years, I have been more inspired to take pictures of the food that I cook or grow. I'm not much of a photographer so the pictures are all that great in quality but let me tell you how delicious this turkey breast was for dinner! I've always been someone who, if hosting a holiday dinner or party, will take a picture of the table before sitting down to dinner. I'm not sure why now... maybe because I'm making more sophisticated meals (when I have time of course) than I did ten years ago. Or.... because I watch Top Chef every week.... who knows.....
I'm getting catalogs in the mail for halloween costumes. It's the time of the year I dread especially now that Gretchen fits a size 4 for girls. I must confess that I have never been all the crazy about Halloween. I certainly only celebrated before because my sister-in-law had an annual party. Living in an apartment in Evanston in our first seven years of marriage did not bring many if any trick-o-treaters to my door. Once I had kids, all of that changed! It was fun to dress up the girl as a chili-pepper (1st year), Princess Leia (2nd year), ladybug (3rd year) and Cat-in-the-Hat (last year). However this year, she would like to be either Wonder Woman or Daphne (from Scooby Doo). She wants to be one of these because of my bad parenting.... I let Gretchen look at kids catalogs (usually toy catalogs) but this time of year they all have Halloween costumes in them. Most of the catalogs are okay. The costumes seem age appropriate. However we get several catalogs for just Halloween that end up in Gretchen's little hands where some of the sexiest costumes come in a size 4/6 (for kids). Don't believe me? Look at this Purrrty Kitty Child Costume (even the name bothers me....). I have nothing against the company who makes this because I don't blame them for this costume. I blame fellow parents who buy this costume! Why would you want your daughter to dress up like this? At any age but at age 4? I don't understand it. There is another costume called Major Flirt where a girl dresses up in a sexy little army dress with Major Flirt on the chest and knee high boots. Really? Sigh.... Depending on your political leanings, you may think I'm a crazy feminist (because as I must point out that boys costumes are not nearly if at all sexualized the way girls costumes are) OR you may think I'm a prude because I'm overreacting about a kids costume. Either way, I don't care. If you want your child to dress up like a little tart, that's your business but they won't be getting much candy out of me until they put some clothes on and dress up like the little kids they are.....
I kinda loathe the fairy tale princess/damsel in distress since the stories are sad usually (mother and/or father are dead or sick or stupid). I try to keep it to myself though because Gretchen seems to like these stories. I try not to push the Disney version on her (in fact I shy away from it) and would rather she hear the Brothers Grimm version since it seems more gritty. Anyhow, this post shows what could have happened to our lovely princesses and it cracks me up!
Some months ago I posted about learning Photoshop (though it's not technically the Adobe product). I have gotten better with it. I made Gretchen's birthday invitation with it. I also re-did her blog and put up a new banner. I'm going to re-do my blog and the boys' blog too with new banners. I still haven't learned everything I want to but what's important is that I have goals. I've been keeping a personal goal list on my computer for a while and though I haven't updated it in awhile, it reminds me that I want to do more than just work and parent (two worthy activities of course!). Though I won't share everything on my list (too embarrassing!), a few things that I am still thinking about: learning to sew (my mother made clothes for me and I want to do that for my kids), learn to play an instrument (I wanted it to be guitar but maybe piano is more my speed), learn more web 2.0 stuff (I am kind of learning xml to alter my blogs - it would be cool to make my own app for anything!), and of course, lose weight (never leaves the list just moves around it). I have accepted that until the kids are older, it will difficult to spend a lot of doing any of these things but hey, I never thought I would have a vegetable garden but I did accomplish that! (Steve took it over but I am okay with that - he is way better at it than I am).
So I am a fan of Jon and Kate plus 8. I started watching it before I had the twins mainly because the kids are a little older than Gretchen. I have found the show reassuring on developmental and behavioral issues with her - it's like a reality check: oh 2 year olds just don't eat sometimes, or preschoolers just cry over everything. While I was pregnant with the boys, I was even more interested since they had multiples and I have found great comfort in knowing that "it can be done" without the marriage falling apart or the kids being neglected. Needless to say but I will say it anyway, boy am I disappointed now. They have some real problems now that I am not sure I want to see. On the 0ther hand, I believe you should always try to work out your marriage problems no matter how grave so I am rooting for them to make it. I don't need to see that on TV but I do want to know that they are trying to fix it. I have been reading a lot of internet stuff about them and many people are saying we should just not watch the show. In my heart I know this is probably the best thing for the family, I just love those kids. Maybe they should stop doing the show but do a few specials every year so we can still see all 8 of them. TLC... You listening?
and I have nothing to show for it...... House is still a wreck, kids are still wonderful but making me crazy. I am really dealing with intermittent guilt at being overwhelmed with two babies. I hate to say how hard it is because it's not like I'm ungrateful. I am so grateful for my children but wow! It is a lot to take. Steve and I are doing our best but there is friction and suffocation at the day to day activities. Then other times we simply rise above it all and choose to be happy. Why every moment cannot be like, I don't know. I guess choosing to be happy is working in of itself sometimes.....
I haven't had a ton of time lately to blog... I barely do twitter compared to all the folks I'm following. Heck, I don't even update Facebook every day like I used to.... Excuses, excuses... A lot of that has to do with Sean being in the hospital and the car accident... Like on Lost when Ben pushed the frozen donkey wheel, I feel like that whole ordeal pushed me out of my groove and has me skipping through time instead. So, I thought I would post something today because my dreams have been so weird lately. Most of them I cannot remember for very long but I wake up knowing I had a bizarre sleep experience.
Long ago work colleagues have been in my dreams. My friend Rachel just moved back here from Iowa and I had a dream that she came over to dinner before she made a long journey. ??? I don't know. Then other dreams are easier... A guy I used to work with who constantly accused me of taking his jokes too personally (when they were at my expense....) had a baby a few years ago. In my dream he is trying to suffocate one of the boys and I walk in and catch him. I go bananas on him and suggest we do the same to his precious one. At least with this dream, I know it's because I am worried about Evan (he seems to be behind Sean a few weeks in the respiratory virus). I think the dream represents how going to the pediatrician makes me feel dumb because all the ever tell us is give him more breathing treatments. Or they end up in the hospital like Sean and Gretchen.
I think the weird dreams have also been coming this week because Gretchen has taken to waking up at 2am and staying awake a few hours at least once a week. Last night she was up and was calling us. I dreamt that she had the flu and was throwing up everywhere... Nice, huh?
At least it's Friday! I plan on sleeping as much as our children will allow tonight. I think if I don't, my mind and my body may go on strike!
Did I mention I think I have allergies? Nose is running and eyes are watering....
Although I know I should be sleeping, I am up putzing around the internet and facebook (national time waster craze that it has become), flipping through pictures on Flickr, reading my friends' tweets and looking for a good chicken recipe all at once it seems while Steve tinkers with his frakin iPod. Why I feel the necessity to do this instead of get some much needed sleep, I'll never know. I've just talked my self into going to bed..... Good night..
Well, I haven't posted much in a while which is no big deal since I am certain that maybe two people read this. And one of them is not my husband.... I don't even think he knows the web address to get here.... Anyway, the holidays were great. We both had two weeks off so we had a lot of time to spend with the kids and futz around the house. Having all of the kids home was a bit stressful but I am glad for it because the twins are really getting cute and interesting and Gretchen is absorbing so much so quickly that she will be a girl and not my baby if I look away for more than a few minutes.
I am not much for New Year's resolutions - I always pick something small and achievable. One year I resolved to eat breakfast and kept it more or less. One year I resolved to pray at dinner and kept that one too. And finally I resolved to recycle which I keep more or less. Of course, I only remember the ones that I kept..... So this year, with all the demands of work and kids, I resolved to pay bills on time. Isn't that pitiful? But I am just not keeping up with the mail and paper on my desk so I think that's my resolution.
Thinking about my resolution got me thinking about my hobbies and how they change over time. I consider photography, cooking, reading and television my main hobbies (I know - I have no ambition I guess). I decided I want to learn how to alter photographs and learn photoshop type stuff so I can do more with the images I have. I take a lot of pictures but it always feels like I could do more to make them right. Over the holidays I bought a scanner and Corel Photo Shop Pro (I don't actually like Adobe's interface so I went with Corel which will work with adobe files). I was getting all into learning it and then I realized the sad truth of my life right now.... I don't have time for hobbies. Steve was "fixing" his computer for almost the entire time we were off so I didn't devote that much time to my photo obsession but I think if I write about how I am going to do it/learn it/etc. that it will come true! What's the saying? "Fake it until you make it".... That's me right now! We'll see how it goes. I give myself six months to learn techniques and publish some stuff here.